I spoke to him last Wednesday… He was upbeat, yet anxious… concerned about what needed to be done at home to take care of his parents, his dogs, his brother, car stuff, house stuff – the business of life… Almost all of his thoughts had to do with taking care of his family. “I’m afraid to know what I’m going to find...” he said “…when I get home.”
He had been in the hospital for three weeks.
Last night I spoke to Chris in New Zealand. I wanted to make sure he knew that Mike was gone. We talked about the mysteries of Mike’s life and the secrets that our family keeps. (Are they my secrets to share with you now?)
Those secrets – who have they helped? What life have they made easier?
It seems to me they have caused more pain than anything else. When family cannot smile generously and embrace one another, when we can’t make room for those that our loved ones love, what does it benefit? And when, after all, are we worthy to judge the life of others?
What are the limits of love? What does love look like? How does it act?
When do we love for the sake of loving?
That much of Mike’s life was hidden, that even at the end he worried about what others might know – wouldn’t it have been better if he could have just known that we loved him?
How do we open our arms to the whole person?
Part of me falls away with you but still part of you stays.
----
Michael Cooper
Native of Hamilton, Alabama
Sign Aries
Birthday March 28, 1959 (I might be a little off on this.)
Mike lived for a time in Birmingham, Alabama and then lived for many years in Los Angeles. In the 90s, while living in LA, he was the victim of a knife attack. He returned to Alabama in the late 90s to help care for his parents.
He was my first cousin. I grew up with Mike. My other cousin, Chris, and I are concerned that those who knew him (loved him) are aware of his death. We would also like to hear from anyone who may have known him. Please leave a post or pass this along to anyone you know who might have known him.
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